This phrase has saved my sanity.
No longer do I bother trying to rationalize the stories my friends tell me and wrap my head around their logic, and no longer do I have to bother finding an appropriate and non-judgmental response, instead I just say, “Ok, Girl!” Really they’re going to do what they want to do anyway, so why even bother trying to give advice.
I have long since realized that people love running into brick walls. Well I’m done wrapping myself around their legs to slow them down on their sprint to the bricks. Girl go. Don’t let me stand between you and the wall, I just say “Ok, Girl,” and when they get tired they’ll stop.
Same for me, I can’t stand going to people for the same problem over and over again, so I don’t. I’d rather keep it to myself than to appear cyclical or stagnant. If anyone hears me incessantly ruminating its likely Deeds but he signed up for this. Even then I don’t like to show him that I’m banging my head. So I don’t. If I feel myself in a deja vu complaining situation I tell myself, shut up Jess-or change it.
Recently a friend of mine told me she was reading her journal from a year ago and noticed she had the exact same problems. Do you know how mad that would drive me? Anyway she thought it was funny in an ironic way, and I thought its time to WAKE UP! However, all I said was, “Really, girl? That’s crazy,” and kept it moving. She wasn’t looking for anything more than that anyway. So we both overlooked it. Am I a bad friend? Maybe…but hell its time to be selfish and there’s nothing I could’ve said that she didn’t already know.
So, I offer you my friendship cheat code.