87 or Premium

I drive what is technically categorized as a “luxury vehicle”.  Due to this classification there are certain things about my car I must be acutely aware of, one is oil.  I have to make sure that my oil stays changed because of the high performance V8 engine it uses a lot of oil, and a car with no oil is not a running car for long!  Secondly, all my parts cost more; I learned this the expensive way when I had to recently replace tires and the like.  Lastly and most basically, my car takes premium gas.  Not only that, but if its down below 5 gallons (it says numbers) she starts throwing a fit.  Camielle (as I’ve named her) likes to be taken care of.  I keep her clean, gas’d up, oiled down, with new shoes and the like.  She is 15 years old with 83k miles…that’s a well taken care of car! What got me thinking was when I was balancing my checkbook for the month of January and saw how much went into Cammi compared to me.

I have been literally taking better care of my car than I have been myself.  Last summer I found out that I have a pretty horrible imbalance of hormones which requires me to take certain supplements to even things out.  I feel so much better when I take them but I just…forget? Or I resent the fact that I have to take so many pills a day.  I recently went to get my hair done and saw how badly it was thinning at the top (a result of this hormone imbalance as one of the symptoms is male-pattern baldness; great right?!) My stylist suggested more water and to increase my biotin intake.  Wonderful…another pill.  Similarly, I went to get my oil changed on monday and my mechanic said, you need to get new front tires and have your brakes checked because your fluid was low.  I groaned but tuesday morning I was a the tire and brakes shop and it was done.  Cammi: 1 Jessica: 0.

I’ve been looking forward to school opening back up so I could start back at the gym. I want so badly to run in a 5k by June and a 10k by October but the endurance and stamina is not going to come to me laying swaddled in my bed.  How about the things I eat? Its been atrocious I can tell you that…My friend The Dreamer reminded me of a quote, “What you have become is the price you paid to get what you used to want.” –Mignon McLaughlin.  How utterly true…I wanted to stay in bed another hour and so I have where I am right now fitness wise.  Perhaps to get something different, before you do it you have to want it.  Want it more than you fear it.  Does that sound asinine? Why? People fear greatness all the time, its why we’re so keen on mediocrity.  It’s why no matter the benefit of premium people still put 87 in their cars.

Some of my best friends and I started a long distance book club and our first book was The Happiness Project, in our discussion we hit on how perhaps it was easier for this woman to do such a project because she is a writer…her life is open-ended and the normal 8-5 woes do not apply to her.  I digressed, I argue that its difficult for anybody to make happiness a priority no matter their schedule.  I believe that if we let it, time will occupy itself in a variety of different ways that do not include our personal well being.  We have to fight for that, we have to allot time.  I felt like such a hypocrite taking that stand.  KNOW|EXCUSES. Get accountable…time to get Jessica on the board.

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