I was driving to the hotel last weekend with Cleo and we were talking about how you have to take care of yourself above all else, even family. And how sometimes family will tear you down, use and abuse you all in the name of being kin. I’m sure we’ve all seen examples of this in our own families, or at least heard of it. I, to my knowledge, have only ever had things said behind my back by “family”. And that’s fine, because they aren’t saying anything I haven’t heard before.
The thing that gets me is…the airs some people put on. I’ve always been a fan of calling a spade a spade. Today I asked a family member for a favor. They said they weren’t comfortable with it, and I completely respect their decision. However, the tone…the almost stadium-surround sound echo of the inner monologue was enough for me to know exactly where I stand with that family member. It was unfortunate, but I’m glad I know.
I don’t like having people in my life that I can’t turn to. I truly don’t. I choose not to associate with ornamental people because I don’t like the confusion, I don’t like the facade. Last week I could tell some people were not to celebrate me. Of course I noticed, and I made note of it. I don’t believe in keeping those types of people around either.
Friends are the family you make for yourself. I love my family, but I (respectfully) don’t fuck with everybody in my family. Same with people I know. I can love you without sharing my life with you. So that’s what I think I’ll be doing.


2 thoughts on “Family

  1. Sometimes it takes getting burned a few times before this sinks in. well, it did (does) for me. There are people in my life – friends and family – that drain me and leave me feeling bleh. Whether it’s because of insincerity or greed or guilt trips or whatever, I just don’t feel good when I interact with certain folks. I’ve had to distance myself and then learn to be OK with it and not feel bad about it. Like you said, you have to know what’s best for you.

  2. “I can love you without sharing my life with you.” This resonates with me. Sometimes it is definitely better to love people from afar to avoid the heartache and the falseness. It’s so important to be true to yourself and to surround yourself with people who operate on similar truths…

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