I read a few articles not long ago about how when black people become more successful they have a tendency to want not to identify as black. For example, they do not want to be the good black lawyer they only want to be seen as the good lawyer. To some extent I think its “cute” to want to live in a color blind world; but keeping it 100 that just is damn near impossible. Not only so, but among scholars its agreed that it is not colorblindness that makes someone enlightened, it is acknowledging the differences we all have an not being affected by them. Now…take that thought and continue reading.
I was standing in the middle of a salsa club last night with my friends and I heard myself say, “I’m going to marry a black Southern guy.” Why? Because as weird as it sounds things are so much more clear there than other so-called progressive places. You take a place like California which is likely one of the most liberal states en totale but I’ve found it to be a place where…hmm people are playing a big game of Keeping up. Not all, I am grossly generalizing. I take moving to California kind of how people take pledging…you better know who you are before hand otherwise you’re in for a whirlwind of changing.
I was talking to Cleo about PWI vs. HBCU and I was telling her that same fact I opened with and how because of the timid take on identity we (as a people) Harvard over Howard. I’m no exception to this; when I thought about schools I never even considered HBCUs and was very averse to the thought of them. This was mostly because I grew up around so many it was not an experience I thought I needed. I still don’t regret my decision but I am now thinking about these things for my kids and even my sisters.
It’s like it clicked. Now I get why Oprah pours money into Morehouse (to uplift and encourage our black men; the rightful pillars of our community). Now I understand why Cornel West raves about Howard yet teaches at Harvard (to become an authority, to be endorsed by the clout of Harvard while spreading the gospel of our people). Now I understand why Dr. Kim told me I owed it to my race to marry a Black man and produce more black children. I get it more than ever and I find it so funny that it took moving 3000 miles away from home to really appreciate being there and how fucking beautiful growing up in Atlanta was. There is no other city in the world like my city. There are no other people in the world like my people.
I’m excited for where I am right now (I say that a lot, but I really mean it.) I see how what I am doing right now, on this day are laying a foundation.
In other news in order to truly be an asset I need to be an exemplar. So I’m working on getting my credit in order and setting my finances on the path of freedom. I say it that way because I do not ever want to be held back by something I could have had power over, by something I could have helped. I want to build kings and I want to birth queens and I just am overjoyed with the responsibilities and the purpose I’m finding in my life.
Maybe I’ll talk to Fat about Howard. Maybe.