Help me to learn patience with myself. Help me to accept the love in the forms you send it. Help me to be gracious and not dismissive. Help me to understand my own limits at this time. I know that my circumstance is temporary and that I will not always be in repair, but while I am, Lord, help me to accept “Good Enough.”
Help me to believe it is okay to be angry. Help me to believe it is okay to feel used. Help me to believe that even in my anger and even when I feel used that that is not the sum of who I am and what I can offer this world. Help me to continue rejecting the shame of my present truth. I, Jessica J. Williams recently experienced sexual assault. I said “No” and I never again said “yes”. Help me to forgive myself for not fighting and for choosing to survive in the way I knew how at the time. Help me forgive those who do no understand the difference between silence and intentional compliance. Help me to release the anxiety from my body. It feels as if I’m raw, inside out and everything touching me is permeating my boundary. Help me to re establish my boundaries. Help me to trust again. Help me to desire intimacy again. Help me to contribute in meaningful ways to people meant to be in my life. May your light be present in me always. May it shine through even in times of despair and confusion.
Amen and Ashe