The Morning After

Though admittedly I was not as emotional watching this election, nor was I as nervous about the outcome should my preferred candidate lose, it was still wonderful to see President Barack Obama be re-elected. As I watched the election results, however, I had the words of two other Black men on my mind. One of a professor, Dr. N who pointed out the partisanship is really urban versus rural. And the other of my advisors husband who said many things and among them, “relax into it, you don’t do the work.”

I had a friend’s mom ask me if I was voting for President Obama because he was black. I told her yes, confidently. Among other reasons, but I would be lying if I discounted this truth. And why should I? I even love the unease that comes to some at having a Black man, in specific, as the leader of our nation. As I looked at the city of Chicago and the diversity in the crowd of POTUS supporters I thought, this is why I have to move back to a city. I love the culture that dwells within metropolitan areas. I love my own city and how distinct each neighborhood is but they blend together so effortlessly to make one delicious Atlanta. I have never considered myself a Democrat, but I have to say the ugliness of intolerance curdling to the top of the GOP within the last 5 years has been disgusting.  I figure in cities its a constant mix, a stirring of the pot as transplants move in, out, and throughout. And to some extent, for me, its about education and professional opportunity.  On the other hand its about urban youth and the chance to make a difference. To say, look at me–in to me, see–I look like you we are each fighting our own battles but do not fight them alone anymore. I am here for you, there are no excuses, let’s move.

When I think about my own purpose and my own aspirations I get overwhelmed. For a class assignment  I am having to consider where I’ll be in 2, 5, and 10 years and I have been supremely uncomfortable with verbalizing it. When Henry offered that I don’t do the work, I felt about a million lbs lift off my chest. Of course I don’t. I get out of the way and the divine does the work. That’s it. The anxiety of paralyzing fear over choosing the right path…I just have to walk confidently in the direction that my heart choses. Right now, more than ever, that is teaching.

I had what I would call “a moment” with my class on Monday and we took a time out from lecture and addressed some frustrations and other elephants in the room.  After class I received messages from them claiming how pleased they were and how close they felt to their classmates. I was honest with them, and in turn they were honest with me. And we can only grow from that. Mondays class is why I have to do this work.

Lastly, I thought about my Pakistani classmate who pointed out the humanity in out political system yesterday. At the end of last night Mitt Romney may not be the president but he got to go home to his wife and family. He is not in exile, President Obama wished him well, and he is still in every sense of the words, one of us. We see ugly campaigning but we do not see a dictator nor military coups, nor violence. What we see is bad, but the perspective she offered reminded me of how wonderful it truly is to be in a country that supports civic disagreement and the freedom of speech.

I suppose having held all this, the morning after has been one where I smiled, said thank you to my source and set an intention to get out of the way. Its not President Obama, its something he represents to each of his voters. Its a promise we need upkept. Its work we ultimately have to do ourselves before we can see it.  And that’s the great irony of it all.

Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us or we find it not.
~Ralph Waldo Emerson


As I watched our First Lady, Michelle Obama, deliver what is arguably one of the most heartfelt, endearing, and riveting speeches in recent history I started to cry for three reasons.

1…as I attended our SOLES welcome back reception for new and returning students and I mixed and mingled, Dr. Green approached me gently reminding me that we need to meet. I felt that tug in my stomach, the one you got when you were younger and an elder started telling you about life. As true as it all may be, you’re not sure you want their wisdom just yet. I have such anxiety about opening up more.

My head spun as I held conversations with faculty, new and returning students about classes, summer break, and other such small talk. I heard our librarian Dr. Byrd’s voice…she tells me I know everybody and am involved with everything, and I need to be in politics. Again that stomach churn. I have no desire to be in politics, but the though of somehow being able to effect change at such a large (and very public) level makes me panic. I keep hearing Zachary ask “where are you?” I hate attention but I just feel like I am being prepared to handle it. I think know I will be faced with this sooner rather than later.

When I saw Michelle not only command, but engage her attention I was so inspired. This was about her, in all her many roles, being able to connect to us on the most basic human level. More than that, she did so with grace. It was not boastful, nor (and perhaps for me, most importantly) was she in any way apologetic in her strength.

2…Michelle Obama looks like me. Read: I imagine she uses some mixture of oils and lotion to fight dry, ashy skin. She likely wraps her hair at night and ties it in a satin scarf. But its not just the aesthetics…she grew up with parents who worked extremely hard to see that she succeeded. She is an ivy league graduate with a terminal degree who had/has an incredible job. What does it mean to me to be able to see a black woman be accomplished at something other than having an attitude? What does it mean to see a black woman command a room without cursing, yelling, or exposing her body? What does it mean to see a black woman openly love her black husband, and praise her black father for defining himself by the success of his children? What does it mean to see this highly accomplished black woman prioritize her family above all other professional or personal accomplishments?

Which segues into 3…Michelle and Barack are equally yolked. To use a biblical allusion…but can you think of one better? I love than she is an articulate, intelligent, compassionate, and beautiful woman who standing alone is amazing, but her ability to be all that and part of a greater unit is amazing to me. It suggests to me that its possible to be both passionate career woman and nurturing wife and mother. Hard nosed intellectual and compassionate humanitarian, and all the other dichotomies. It tells me that we are not the either ors people suggest we are (stay at home mom type or working mom type) and that some women do it beautifully. It shows me the kind of woman I hope to be.
It also shows me that the kind of man I deserve exists and is seeking a-Me. It is that assurance that I can be my whole self. My true self and still be loved, accepted, sought after and cherished. And I suppose some people will say its an act. Or its media fabrication or that its easy because of the many luxuries afforded to them. I choose to believe the opposite.

So when I cried, it was because here in front of me was a woman who I so admire, telling me through her life that my dream is not only legitimate but attainable. Because here she stood telling a story I connect with of sacrifice, fortitude, and love. I cried because of the embodiment of true grace. Eloquent in delivery, empathic in ethos, it was just everything. That, to me, is worth getting to know myself more. If somewhere in me lies the ability to awaken potential then I want to get to know that part of me.

The fourth reason, then, is because as I watched Michelle I saw my self, and it was a part of me I found so hard to believe in. A part of me that was invalidated and undervalued. A part of me desperately needing voice and affirmation, who is sure of herself and her abilities and who is not ashamed of her vulnerabilities. I was able to see that, me…and I cried at never having seen her beauty and strength before.

I feel how I look

bitten from Deeds…but damn, doesn’t our First Family look spectacular? 99 problems but a..Michelle ain’t one, dang I got sucked into Boondocks tomfoolery

her skin is immaculate! I mean…that can’t be just regular old cocoa butter!Puedo ser su presidente, mi amor?

This makes my front porch look like the slave quarters :-/ You just don’t smile that big unless you’re happy…I’m just sayin

FAILure Friday

The following things/people get the Almighty

  • untitled-2Every hater, especially those in and of the Fox “News” Network who decided that President Barack Obama was supposed to change the whole damn nation in 100 days.  I mean seriously I’m not a Bush-basher but he had 8 years (thats 365 days x 6 years+ 366 days x 2 years=2922 days) of what the fuck and people can’t give Pres. O the benefit of the dang doubt?!  I would LOVE to know what Bill O’R did in his first 100 days besides not shit. Or Ken Mehlman what have you done in all your 33 years? Michael Steele? Dick Cheney I won’t even go into what the best thing YOU can do for America *pause*…Now if after two years there has been no significant impact on the state of the Union, or an even worse economic downturn-get at me and I’ll take it all back.
  • People out here still wearing the following: Fila, Pelle Pelle, FUBU, Cross Colours, South Pole,Lugz,  krimped hair, square tips, a.n.y.t.h.i.n.g and e.v.e.r.y.t.h.i.n.g from CitiTrends (except this really cute cardigan I found there for 2 dollars lol), Braids-especially if you are a man…especially if you are over 18
  • Black people still participating in any kind of light skinned|dark skinned beefery…you are a failure times 3
  • Celebs thinkin that they can put on clothes, look slick derelict and somehow think its cute?!? FAIL FAIL FAIL FAIL FAIL1
  • Bloggers who post non-dish about the same 5 people over…and over…and OVER again.
  • Bow-Wow…team B.Scott beesh!
  • People who steal during this recession…who exactly is paying you for these stolen goods??? Plus don’t you realize if someone catches you stealing their stuff you are 8x more likely to catch a Stinkmeiner-type ass whoopin bc we are all poor and are thisclose to the edge?  Special Shout out to Sherane lol, keep your piece handy!
  • Guys (and a few girls) who use Twitter as the jump-off collector. I’m pretty sure it takes more than 140 characters worth of bulls**t to get with me. Thanks but no thanks.
  • Everybody talking about the Swine-Flu…my favorite two thoughts on it are as follows: “People said that a Black man would be President when pigs fly…100 days in-swine flu” and “90 people get swine flu and everybody is panicing and wearing masks, 90 MILLION people have HIV|AIDS and people are still not wearing condoms” Just some ish to think about
  • FaceBook-I finally quit the book of faces, it was getting too much like My.Space and not to mention my wall posts were goin up on the homepage–definitely didn’t like that.  Plus I’m pretty sure that the things I say on this blog are enough to get me in trouble without a FB lol…
  • Twitter and these 35 employees who can’t work out picture uploads….Guys face it you’re popular now…hire some more people! I’ll take a side running add if it means people get to see my face when I type!

Conversely here’s a few people who get the thumbs up this week: My Girl Brittani (it was her birthday on Monday, plus I think we are the same person…no seriously), EJ the Sports Man (lol you kno like..OJ the juice man? Funny? AYE OK..ok Fail for jess lol but he shouted me out this wk on  his blog so I gotta show love back), my boi Hasan the cougar killer who promised me I could be on his radio show (, and last but not least Ladessa who is such a talent I’ll be featuring her in my Artist Spotlight real soon but I didn’t want her to think I forgot :-)

Have a good weekend yall, and don’t do anything that will land you on the list next week!

The hope and the dream…the Prototype

Doing my morning reading, and I came across this post by BlogXilla that highlighted President and First Lady Obama as exemplars for black love and commitment to the black family.  If you didn’t know by now its a goal of mine to make a significant impact in the state of the Black Family-by helping to rebuild and repair it.  I realize this task is one of epic proportion and that I certainly can’t do it alone but that isn’t my intention. I want to inspire people to do it themselves.

As a student who really has only begun my academic journey, I have roughly 7 more years of school *since* but you don’t need a degree to make a difference…The Obamas fill my heart with joy because it was almost like a sign from God that this is not an impossible dream. That the happily ever afters aren’t exclusive to a race that’s not mine.  That a black man can be the President of the freakin greatest most powerful country in the world, yet he knows that his wife and family come first.  THAT is beautiful to me…



President and First Lady Obama

President and First Lady Obama

Sorry I had to re-post…tell me how can you see this picture and not believe in love. Not believe that there is one person out there meant to bring out the best in you-to challenge you, support you, care for and cater to you.  How can you honestly look at either President or First Lady Obama and not know that they are 100% committed, and so very in love with one another. I don’t know about you but this is just as inspirational as all the speeches I’ve heard.  At the end of the day love is all that matters and this right here is what so many young black people need to see. That patience is a virtue and you should wait for your Barack or wait for your  Michelle. Its not impossible or intangible.  *sigh* Today has been an emotional rollercoaster-in the most fantastical way.

the 44th

Nothing can steal my joy today. I’m too proud to be an American. A Black American. A member of the Youth of America. A Woman in America. A Black Woman in America. Just PROUD.

Nothing greater will happen in our lifetime than the resurrection of Hope, the abolition of excuses, and the resounding reply of our call to service. ~JessJ

Nothing greater will happen in our lifetime than the resurrection of Hope, the abolition of excuses, and the resounding reply of our call to service. ~JessJ

Presidential Mall

Presidential Mall

Civil Rights Museum in Memphis-10

Civil Rights Museum in Memphis-10

Watching the Inauguration in Kenya

Watching the Inauguration in Kenya

I'm not mad at it vanilla face...get real familiar with that black crayon

I'm not mad at it vanilla face...get real familiar with that black crayon

First Lady Michelle Obama, my hero

First Lady Michelle Obama, my hero

"To those who cling to power through corruption and deceit and the silencing of dissent, know that you are on the wrong side of history, but that we will extend a hand if you are willing to unclench your fist." Change over Fear! President Barack Obama

"To those who cling to power through corruption and deceit and the silencing of dissent, know that you are on the wrong side of history, but that we will extend a hand if you are willing to unclench your fist." Change over Fear! President Barack Obama

Light up the Darkness

So tomorrow Barack is the President, officially. Now what can I do to stay politically aware active and inVOLved in my community? I’m thinking that next fall I will be attending the CBC-ALC and get involved in the Congressional Black Caucus, and continue to work with the children of course. I saw today that their opening a Boys and Girls Club up the street from me and I’ve been working with B&GC since I was like 14 so that’s cool with me to continue the work. It also seems that my life is centering around West-Atl so I won’t fight that either. But a friend of mine D$ went to the CBC-ALC last year and was like why don’t more young people attend this? You honestly can’t beat the networking, the knowledge, the involvement…its a win|win. So I think I’ll plan to stay as politically aware as I have been as of late.  So long as I have President and First Lady Obama, Hill Harper, Donna Brazille, Don Lemon, and Monica Kaufman lol I’ll be inspired to be a politically aware young black person!

Focusing your life solely on making a buck shows a certain poverty of ambition. It asks too little of yourself. Because its only when you hitch your wagon to something larger than yourself that you realize your true potential. ~Barack Obama

Focusing your life solely on making a buck shows a certain poverty of ambition. It asks too little of yourself. Because it's only when you hitch your wagon to something larger than yourself that you realize your true potential. ~Barack Obama

For the first time in my adult life, I am proud of my country. Because it feels like hope is making a comeback. ~ Michelle Obama

For the first time in my adult life, I am proud of my country. Because it feels like hope is making a comeback. ~ Michelle Obama


Free at last, free at last, we have freed ourselves, at LAST ~Donna Brazile

"Free at last, free at last, we have freed ourselves, at LAST" ~Donna Brazile


When I was elementary school age I lived in the city of Atlanta. To avoid attending Atlanta Public Schools which don’t exactly have the best educational reputation, my mother send me to an all-black Private Prep school. Part of our curriculum just like math, social studies, and english, was also Black History. I didn’t understand just how important this would be at the time but now being older I think that my devout interest in Black History and really knowing the struggles of my people were initalized and cultivated at this school.
While taking my sisters to school today the radio station V-103 was playing excerpts of Dr. Martin L. King’s sermons and speeches. I made my sisters listen. Then I asked them what they knew of Dr. King. They knew the basics but I didn’t feel like they truly understood the importance of him. As I told them, I told myself and its not that I’ve never realized it but today more than any other day in my life it became gut-wrenchingly poignant. I told them that our family might not have exsisted if not for Dr. King and the others who fought for civil rights. That statement in and of itself is pretty heavy. To think that I wouldn’t be where I am today, my sisters might not exsist, the man who raised me from the age of 9 would not only NOT be in my life but might be part of a world I would be persecuted for trying to experience. That’s a lot. I found Dr.King’s message particularly touching this year, as do many, because of what is happening in our nation as we prepare to swear in the 1st African American President, Barack Obama. Had he been born in Georgia, Mississippi, or Alabama at the same time his father wouldn’t have been killed in Africa, he would’ve been scenting the southern air with the smell of strange fruit. I look in-ward at my grandmothers. One experienced segregation 1st hand on the side of Blacks marching and protesting, attending services at Ebenezer and collecting clippings of riots and protests in Alabama. One mixed as her mother was impregnated by a man she worked for-she grew up working as a maid/housekeeper for white people and though she is 1/2 white she loathes them to this day and I fear has never accepted that people-some people- have changed. One is white and from upstate New York probably only heard of the civil rights movement on the radio and if she has any ill-feelings towards black people she doesn’t show it as she embraced not only my sisters but my mother and myself as her own blood family. I think of how not just Barack Obama’s story wouldn’t be possible if not for America being the setting. MY OWN story would not be possible.
I’m thankful to Barack Obama for inspiring a generation who had begun to take for granted our liberties and freedoms. We were surrendering our right to vote consumed with hopelessness and he catalyzed a movement that left us with a feeling of not only accomplishment but also conviction. We know now that we not only matter, but we have the power to change the world we live in. For so many years others poisoned our minds with doubt and inferiority, and now we are starting to understand that the only limits we have are the ones we place on ourselves. As I always say, where Faith is infinite as are possibilities. I believe that both Dr. King and President Elect (God it’ll feel so good when I don’t have to include that Elect) Barack Obama consider[ed] themselves servants of the people. We must stand up to the call of action and deliver so that our work, and their work is not in vain. The battle is not yet won it has just begun because we just NOW understand that Yes, we can.
In closing, Frank Ski-radio dj- asked listeners what they thought Dr. King would have to say to Barack Obama if he were still alive today? The first listener said, “I believe he would say Matthew 25:23 Well done, good and faithful servant; thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things.” And while I don’t always mean to get Biblical it always ends like this (He is the Alpha and the Omega)…so if we take nothing else from THIS King Birthday take that God has not called us to do anything He did not equip us for. Do not fight the battles of man, we are not called to serve man nor his interests. Do not be discouraged in your good works or feel they go unnoticed because He is all-seeing and all knowing and if He orders your steps you cannot fall. Faith will carry you further than fear, and it will win everytime for as we feed faith fear starves.


HIGHLIGHT OF MY DAY!!! I’m a certified X-men Junkie and 2nd to Gambit, Wolverine was always my favorite, well check out this clip from X-men: Origins Coming out May 1st. and you get to see both, I literally screamed when I saw the playing cards…literally.

This tuesday one of my favorite TV dramadies is returning

00 EST

Nip/Tuck premire Jan 6 10:00 EST

I love this show, its seriously effed up and twisted but in a good way. My old roomie N got me hooked on it and two years later my addiction is just as strong.  Its just demented enough for my taste. Plus that Christian is a laugh out loud nypho crazy.  LOVES it.

In other news, idk if Obama really feels this way…but I’d like to think that somewhere in the back of his mind he really wants black people to just summer,donna (simmer down now) until after 1.20.09 Just let it become all the way legit and official. And maybe even after that still chill out because all this nonsense n501055899_761859_9299 has got to stop. Why we think things like this are in any way acceptable is far beyond my realm of understanding…but I really REALLY wish it would stop. And I’d like to think that Michelle is somewhere calling people some Princeton-level word that is synonymous with the n one. I mean lets not forget she is slick from the south-side of Chicago.  I love her.

An Ounce of Pretention is Worth a Pound of Manure

This is the most wretched bag I’ve seen in a long time…and its even funnier that Sheree Whitfield is carrying it because it just proves she does things like this because “she can”…Trickster of the week.

Sheree...or as I call her Sherry

Sheree...or as I call her Sherry

And TheYBF reports (and Khloe konfirms lol)  that Khloe Kardashian and my BOOOOY Rashad McCants are an item. Damn that’s two of my fav athletes snatched up by the Dash Dolls. Well they have good taste so I can’t even hate.

Rashad McCants

Rashad McCants

For those who are un-aware McCants is a Baller who plans for the Minnesota Timberwolves but more importantly is a former TARHEEL!!!!! Which is my fav. team of any sport of all time. Vols come very very close in tied for 1st but I go crazy for Carolina. Anyway Khloe had this to say, As I’m sure most of you have seen, it’s being reported all over the place that I have a boyfriend.  Well I just wanted to take this opportunity to tell you that it’s true… I do “officially” have a boyfriend.  His name is Rashad McCants and he plays for the Minnesota Timberwolves… Well I hope it works out. Love her, Super love him. Love all around lol.

Lastly my roommate might kill me for sharing the secret but check out THIS SITE for all the hot deals on shoes, bags, frames, etc. I won’t say anymore than that lol.

And P.S. send out your prayers and condolences to John Travolta|Kelly Preston and their family…such a tragedy. The Bahamas is not really the jump off these days.